Archive for the ‘ Dear Diary ’ Category

Don’t Hate Me ’cause You Ain’t Me

…except that I almost hate myself for this little concoction. You’ll see.
After polishing off an entire loaf of bread by myself over the span of about 54 hours, I decided to try eating significantly fewer grain products. Variety is the spice of life, after all. Unfortunately, I seem to be doomed to compulsive behavior. My dumb brain thought, “Hey – if cutting back on bread is my goal, why not start with cutting out ALL grain!” Idiot that I am, my fridge is now stocked with plenty o’ meats and veggies, but all I can crave right now is cheesecake frozen yogurt with chunks of real cheesecake from Yogurtland. This calls for a distraction: Let the kitchen experimentations BEGIN!
I’m not sure how long I’ve had these tins of SPAM Lite in my cupboard, but it never goes bad, right?!?! Okay, so I sliced up about a third of my little tin o’ SPAM, fried it up, and here’s where I got crazy. Instead of doin’ the same ol’ SPAM ‘n’ eggs I so enjoy, I got creative (read: LAZY) and decided to cook those eggs on the SPAM…wait for it…over easy. That’s right. It’ll be over. It’ll be easy. Genius! Sick, sick genius.
Now we come to the part of near-self-loathing: I rather enjoyed Spam-n-eggs over easy. In fact, it may just be my new favorite thing. Shudder if you must (I did), but I can’t deny how delicious I found this dish. Come on, who doesn’t absolutely MELT anytime easy-cooked egg yolks run their golden sweetness ALL OVER the plate and any unsuspecting food in their flow?! It’s almost erotic. You’re even drooling, aren’t you? 😉

Try It Yourself:

SPAM (I used about 1/3 of a tin of SPAM Lite) cut into chunks, then fried

2 eggs, yolks unbroken

With SPAM still fryin’ in the pan, add eggs on top and continue frying until egg whites are set (stir around the whites to break ’em up and cook them all the way through, but protect the yolks as much as possible).

Enjoy alone or over a few slices of toast – and a good helping of self-loathing.



Before I redebut a much-anticipated Zombie Drafted review, allow me to regale (read: bore) you with a few things I learned over this unbelievably packed (I can’t believe it’s only been two weeks) winter vacation.

I learned that…

…trombones love to play outside the studio ’cause in the studio they mostly provide a soundtrack for murders.

…a trombone choir is really good at playing CHORDS.

…my best friend’s brother lives 20 minutes from me in Cali.

…an old roommate’s childhood friend also lives 20 minutes from me in Cali.

…as long as there are gaudy Christmas decorations and a fountain, any crowded place can feel like home if you have your best friend there with you.

…movies are HELLA expensive in Cali.  Avatar (3D, not IMAX) was $16.

…now that I have cruise control and bluetooth, 18-hour drives are pretty tolerable.

…if you find a stray dog without a collar or chip and if no one claims it from the pound within a week, she is yours to love forever and ever and ever…for $120.

…I really am more of a cat person right now.

…many people think I smoke pot.  (FYI: decidedly NOT into drugs)

Eddie Aikau was a LEGENDARY Hawaiian surfer/lifeguard.

…New Year’s Day is not your lucky day if you are shopping for Ninkasi anywhere in Eugene.

…Pierre Bourdieu is buried in Pere Lachaise (famous cemetery; Jim Morrison is among those buried there). I also learned who Pierre Bourdieu was.

…the Clark’s Nutcracker is nicknamed the “Camp Robber” due to their habit of stealing snacks at campsites.

…it’s time to stop learning and start doing.  Except for that whole “stop learning” part.


It's not about the destination...

How to Avoid Unneccessary Human Interaction

One word: Starbucks.
More on that, of course: Starbucks’s Wi-Fi is so powerful I didn’t even have to leave my car for this post. I’m maybe seven or eight parking spots back from the front door and still have two bars (of five). Plenty. I suppose I’ll have to go inside anyway because I promised a friend I’d pick up an application for her, but this frees me up to make a fool of myself in the process if I so choose – I can just move on to another Starbucks (or the parking lot) while I wait for another friend to get off work. Too easy, but so worth the novelty of it!

Festival of the Last Minute

First thing I did when I got home? My best friend from high school and I hit up Portland Saturday Market for the Festival of the Last Minute. Yeah! Nothin’ says welcome home like street vendors, fresh jams, and Girl-Who-Hula-Hoops-While-Playing-the-Saxophone.  Well, maybe One-Handed-Guitar-Hobo.  He rocks pretty hard.  Speaking of rocking, enjoy some snapshots from the last day of the 2009 Saturday Market season.

Dog wearing Oregon coat

Hope this pup wasn't born in Corvallis.

Yeah, it was cold – and it seemed like all the dogs out were TINY!  They were cute, all shivering and hypothermic.  Some owners carried them around in their sweaters.  Others – well, you saw.

Trying to show how cold it is.

This kid thinks we're nuts.

See?!  Cold.  It is surprisingly difficult to get a cold-breath shot on the fly.  This is attempt #4…and that little boy has begun to wonder about the crazies behind him in line for elephant ears.  I wonder, too.

Boy with a spatula through the head

How would you even get that in there?

The best part of the Festival of the Last Minute is that there are more chitlins runnin’ around with kitschy toys than usual…probably because their parents are in an unusually giving mood.  He seemed too polite for me to want to shove a spatula handle-first through his temples, though.  Pity.

Portland Saturday Market '09

I love my town.

A close second to the Kitsch is the Indie.  Arts and crafts edge closer together on this Portland pavement…the edgier it is, the better it sells.  I fall in love with every indie boy I pass on the street.  Sigh.  I love Portland.

On the MAX

Perfunctory MAX shot.

What is it about a day on the town that makes everyone (myself included) take boring photos on the MAX?  Must be that darn holiday cheer!

2009 in Brief


Lived off a 10-lb sack of potatoes with Val, with whom I took a political poetry class that Winter III.


Another Singles Awareness Day.  Ho hum.

Practically lived at the PAC…well, kinda literally, but I didn’t sleep there (just practice, lifting, and SHOWERING).


LAX Spring Break tourney in Colorado Springs, CO.  The week started out in the 80s and ended in a blizzard (yes, literally).

“Fuego got hit in the leg real hard and all that B*@#% got was a YELLOW card!”


LAX Senior Night, then rocked our last away game (UPS)…and ended my college career on a yellow card with 1:30-ish left in the game.  #4: MULTIPLE major fouls!  Oops.  😉


Finally graduated – B.S. in Mathematics, minor in French…le woot.

Turned 23 in Boise, ID and ended the day at a Sounders game in Seattle, WA – thus extending my birthday to a 25-hour day!


Visited Val’s dad in CdA, Maverick & Gio in Missoula, Sierra in Whitefish/Glacier, Meagan’s fam in Great Falls, Kristen & Matt (and their broken-down car) in Ennis, Geezy, Ashley, & Rose in Bozo, Wade in Belt, and Val at Elkin’s on Priest Lake.  Sixteen days on the road and I’m a-gonna make it home tonight.

Maggie & Patrick’s wedding.

Kirsten & Greg’s wedding.


ID3 – St. Paul Rodeo

ID4 – IDK…but last year we watched the fireworks on the Willamette from just south of the Blues Festival. [12/22/09: Oh, now I remember!  Ashley & Brad’s wedding…and watching the fireworks in every town we passed on the drive home.]

Started working at a camp in Florence a week after training ended.

Lumberjack Summer!

Spencer Butte with Lopie…then bought 2 pints of Ben & Jerry’s to make change for parking at the lake. We each ate one. I think I popped a button just writing this.


Bridge jumping in Florence, skim-boarding on breaks, and a week of windsurfing & Goodwill sweaters-by-the-pound.

Unofficial Lumberjack Day turned into Lumberjack Week…and then someone made up a Lumberjack SONG while I was pulled away from campfire.  I started running back toward campfire screaming “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”…then my co-counselor & I almost wet ourselves laughing because That. Just. Happened.

Black Crater with Lopie, Lanikai, & Meryn.

Geoff & Katie’s wedding.

Practically lived in FoGro for a week or two, saying goodbye to friends and sending off summer in style.

Eagle Creek w/ Alana on Tuesday, waterfall hopping w/ Grace, Rachel, & her friend Ryan on Wednesday.


Went to Maui for Katie & Patrick’s wedding & Oahu to visit Shan & Mimi.

Hadn’t even left Oregon when I got a flat tire and had to crash in Eugene on my way to SoCal…movin’ out to save money and the first thing I do is spend $400 on new tires.  Eff.

Moved to SoCal, got a job, and spent the rest of the month playing LAX & waiting for my paperwork to clear.


Started working at Outdoor School in the mountains (again, after missing training week)…and successfully learned my coworkers’ names.


Hiked Crystal Cove & played in the tide pools.

Worked a week (awesome kids), had a week off for Veteran’s Day, worked a week (as a FLOATER), had a week off for Thanksgiving.


Worked a week (GO DUCKS week) – best kids yet, had a week off for snow, worked a week, and now two weeks off for the holidays!

Took 5 months off running and my knees are still buggin’.  Eff that.

Made a GO DUCKS week at work, watched the biggest Civil War Game since 1894, and got free beer & fries from the lady at Papa Jack’s because I made t-shirts just for the game…a great night made even better by the W.

Somewhere in there, went from hating California to “I think I’m gonna miss these people.”  I still miss Oregon, but I have to admit it’s been one helluva ride.  Who knows?  Maybe I’ll even return some day.  Haiti first, this time.


Uh…so in a misguided attempt to reconcile conflicting Google accounts with my Blogger account, I deleted both my undesired Google account AND my ENTIRE Blogger account – in one fell swoop.  EFF.  Whatev.  That was the only thing holding me back from transitioning to a new domain, anyway.  We’ll see how this goes.